My mind is going in a million directions right now. I am feeling afraid at times where I don't even know what to do with myself. I can't live on xanax so I only take it at night to help me sleep. Being home from Atlantic City and the Borgata is good and bad. I so miss the distraction and the real warmth and caring of the people and staff at Borgata. I have to come back to reality. Kids go to school my husband goes to work and I am left with my thoughts and fears. People have gone back to their lives and I feel somewhat alone. I know I am not alone but I do feel that way right now. Hopefully work can be a good distraction. Just get through the day and I am one day closer to being healed. Rosh Hashana is Friday and Saturday and I hope this year turns out to be the best one yet!